Things I learned last night - #1

If you're reading this blog, you must be part of the learning institution that is McGill (or Concordia, but let's not go there...). In the spirit of education, here is the first edition of the series entitled "Things I learned last night." The powers that be might force me to pull the plug on this if things get too out of hand. But in the meantime, enjoy.


I was having a beer with 2 of my close guy friends in a bar near campus. We were watching the game and unwinding after a week of having to cope of various pressing issues. By 11pm things were quiet, when my friend "Andy" (let's call him that because he vaguely looks like the Andy Bernard character in The Office) started talking about flying down to Vegas, getting trashed and waking up married to a stripper. Naturally, within the next 5 minutes, the conversation moved to how a strip club should be our next stop. However, my grandmother always taught me to be frugal in life - throwing $20 bills at skimpily dressed (or butt naked) women is fun, but I'd rather do like that ING guy says, and save my money. Needless to say, Andy wasn't impressed.

Next thing I know, a group of girls of our age group walked into the bar and were headed in our direction (that in itself was a feat, considering the average age in the place was about 45). By that time the flow of conversation had somewhat shifted. When I decided to get the girls' attention, this is what came out of my month:

"My buddy (Andy) here is considering a career change, would you guys pay to see him dance on a stage, naked?"

Considering the amount of beer we've already ingested, that was the best I could do. Meanwhile the look on Andy's face said something like: "I cannot believe you just said that."

Then something unexpected happened: the girls' faces lit up like the Fourth of July, and we were invited to their table within the next 20 seconds.

Lesson of the night: it really doesn't matter what you say, just who you say it to (especially if they're American students on a roadtrip to drink and be merry.